Boss: Can I move your suitcase?
Me: It’s my bag. Sure.
Boss: Why is it kind of heavy?
Me: I usually have random, useful things in there.
Boss: Like what? A weapon?
Me: I’m not sure what’s in there right now. Let’s see.
The current contents of my bag (minus keys and lip gloss):
Boss: Really? A giant wallet, screwdriver, Under Armour shirt and shorts, banana, bottle of water, purple pen and hand lotion?
Me: You never know what you might need. Usually I have a mini Kleenex packet, a hair tie and a stain removal pen in there as well.
Boss: You’re a mess. By the way, there’s a young, new Italian guy named Donato on the 6th floor if you want to meet him.
Me: Is he cute? And I am not a mess! What if I’m hungry? What if I have dry hands? Go ask your wife what’s in her bag right now.
Boss: Okay…and yes, he’s 25 and very handsome. Blue eyes.
He leaves and comes back 20 minutes later
Boss: She has a wallet, keys, scissors, pen, toothpaste, pair of shoes and an orange.
Me: I rest my case…and sign me up for Donato.





I ♥ Natalie Dee…
At least you didn’t like 20 condoms in your bag. That might have looked bad.
Good look with the Italian Stallion.
Thanks!
Also…is that what you carry in your murse?
First it was NOT a murse!!! hahaha…
Second, IF I were a single man, I’d only carry one. Toting too many makes you look cocky. But I’ve been “off the market” a long time, so maybe things have change…
This is why I don’t carry a big purse. Though sadly, the other day in a restaurant, I had my purse sitting open next to me when my husband coughed and a chunk of food flew out of his mouth and into my bag. I still haven’t found the regurgitated morsel. Wonder what your boss would think if he came across that…
laughing and gagging. Had to read that while eating lunch.
Yeah, it was pretty gross.
Haha gross!
I wanna work in your office in addition to photos (if possible) of Donato.
I will do my very best in the least creepiest way possible.
Your boss cracks me up.
Your boss is married?!
Yes. His wife works there too.
If I carried a murse I would put a puppy in it.
I would take your puppy.
Bow wow!
Cute !!!
This is cute Lauren! My purse is a scary place…if I leave it anywhere I freak…not because I am afraid it won’t be returned (I live in Wyoming), but because Lord knows what they might think if they look in it
How can you not admire a girl who carries a screwdriver?
Always the blue-eyed boys…
What, no Pocket Rabbit? No lipstick? Also, please report back on Donato. Thank you.
I don’t know if you saw my comment on my post about your gravatar image — but I love it! It’s muy sexy — it’s got character!
WHAHT? No make-up? And breath mints, I keep those on hand for me and anyone else who may need them.
Ooooooh,what a fun game! Let’s see…
Ok, wallet, keys, headphones, nail file, perfume, midol, tylenol, personal meds (3 bottles), listerine pocket packs, pen, stamps, comdoms (7,lol ), cigarettes, 4 lighters, one packet of grape fundip, roll of cherry halls, napkin, contact drops, comb, rubberband, two paperclips, three packets of splenda, and a plethora of change in the bottom,lol…
Gee, no wonder why I can’t ever find anything lol…
And by the way, is he cute?
My mom called her purse the “silk-lined junkyard”. It always contained those practical things, plus OTC painkillers, bandaids, crayons to keep little kids pacified, and god knows what else.
Ha, screwdriver made me do a spitake. And secondly, I couldn’t agree more with the kleenex. Because of me, my girlfriend now has taco bell napkins in her glove box at all times. Not only is it classy, but you never know when you’re going to have a snot attack. Or sauce attack. Lots of attacks can happen is what I’m saying. And you need to be prepared.
a coffee filter full of miniature (now stale) pretzels, wallet, cheese stick (duh), pair of glasses/extra contacts, keys, iPhone.
…and, f-u coffee filter for your poor freshness obtaining qualities, for serious.
LOVE IT!
Maxi pads. Wooden teething ring. Tube of Baby Orajel Naturals. Medium to large wallet. Chap stick. Asthma inhaler. Keys. No less than SEVEN different colors of lip gloss. One lipstick. Three lip pencils. (JESUS CHRIST YOU’D THINK I MADE MYSELF UP SOMETIMES.) Nail file. Listerine strips. Sunglasses. Tylenol. Compact mirror with a ‘K’ on it. Pack of Kleenex. Note pad. Passport. Toothpicks. Three pens. One pencil. A green ribbon. Old receipts. OH MY GOD I JUST REALIZED THAT I’M A HOARDER.
HAHA, this is my favorite. You’re my favorite and the most amazing hoarder ever.
I love your conversations with your boss! Thanks for the laughs.
Hilarious!! I love that you have a screwdriver in your bag. I like a girl who is ready for anything!
I actually did this same challenge awhile back, and was shocked at everything I was carrying around!! http://sipsofjenandtonic.com/2012/05/27/whats-in-my-bag/
My purse is tiny, but somehow I always have what I need. Glasses, wallet, tweezers, kleenex, hand sanitizer, phone, notebook, gum, nail file, five different shades of lip gloss, and perfume samples. It’s basically a marvel in engineering. I’m sure if I had more space, I’d just carry bigger versions of the exact same things.
Pretty sure there is ALWAYS food in the Fat Girl’s purse. Why? Because I am a Fat Girl…duh! You never know when you might have a thin mint emergency
Never been able to do the man’s shoulder bag thing, but once in a while… when my wallet makes a particularly deep impression on my left cheek, or my pocket knife and keys and car key-fob and all that other stuff get REAL uncomfortable… I think about it.
Haha, no murse for the Dittmer. Not sure why I chose “the Dittmer” but we can go with it.
Been called worse.
It kinda fits.