Summer Fun for Poorish People

9 Jul

Is it hot? Are you kind of poor? Do you want to have fun outside AND cool down at the same time? If you can’t join a pool, go on vacation or live somewhere that is currently experiencing winter, I have the solution!

Here is what you’ll need (4-6 are key, folks):

1. A really good sprinkler.

2. Blow up pool.

3. Grapefruit, orange or cranberry juice.

4. Vodka.

5. An imagination.

6. No dignity at all whatsoever (not to be confused with “No Diggity”– the song by Blackstreet ft. Dr. Dre and Queen Pen).

Okay, so the rest is pretty self-explanatory. Go ahead and blow up the pool, hook that sprinkler up to a hose, mix juice with vodka (or don’t…), put on a bathing suit (or don’t…WINK), sit in the blow up pool while the sprinkler sprays you, get hella tipsy, close your eyes and imagine you’re anywhere but the yard. You’re welcome. Oh, and don’t forget sunscreen. I use the kind with sparkles because it makes me shimmer and my neighbors are probably all “ooooh” and “aaaaah” about it.

Photographic summary:

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 danzka-vodka

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= Yay! 

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49 Responses to “Summer Fun for Poorish People”

  1. twindaddy July 9, 2013 at 11:17 am #

    I’ll just drink the vodka. I don’t care if I’m inside or out.

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:19 am #

      That’s probably the best choice. I’ll be expecting some drunk messages later.

      • twindaddy July 9, 2013 at 12:46 pm #

        Honestly, I just might end up drunk after the day I’ve had. I’ll try to remember to message you but no promises.

  2. The Waiting July 9, 2013 at 11:21 am #

    I AM poorish and I HAVE been wanting to know what I should be doing this summer! Thank you for the idea!

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:22 am #

      Oh good! I’ll be looking for photos on The Waiting Blog’s Facebook page. Not because I’m creepy!

  3. rheath40 July 9, 2013 at 11:28 am #

    My new neighbors have a four kids under five and a kiddie pool. I think I’ll forgo the vodka and just hang out with them. I do have the mentality of a five year old after all. :-)

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:36 am #

      That works, too. Sparkly lotion is a must, though. Don’t forget that.

      • rheath40 July 9, 2013 at 1:17 pm #

        But of course darling. We can NOT forget the sparkly lotion. Sparkly girls like us NEED it. :-)

  4. Carrie Rubin July 9, 2013 at 11:28 am #

    Change my drink to beer and I’m there!

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:36 am #

      I can see you now. It’s kinda funny, and I like it.

  5. CultFit July 9, 2013 at 11:29 am #

    There’s nothing better than beach side beverages in your own back yard! Watch out … Cannon Ball!

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:37 am #

      Hahaha, which may be followed by the purchase of a new blow up pool…or a trip to the hospital! ;-)

  6. RFL July 9, 2013 at 11:29 am #

    Yes. This.

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:37 am #

      I’ve missed you.

      • RFL July 9, 2013 at 8:49 pm #

        I have missed you too! I saw your clip and still have it saved. You are so stinking cute!!

  7. Bob July 9, 2013 at 11:34 am #

    I love playing in the sprinkler, vodka or not!

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:39 am #

      In Canada people do this for the entire week that it’s hot, right?

      • Bob July 9, 2013 at 11:42 am #

        Oh yes! It’s called Sprinkler week! You Yankees have shark week on Discovery, we Canucks celebrate the week when our lawns finally become visible!

        Should happen any day now, go away snow!!!

        • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:44 am #

          *Crosses fingers that Bob gets to run through the sprinkler VERY soon*

  8. Johnny Ojanpera July 9, 2013 at 11:35 am #

    Four kids under 5? That’s amazing. I have yet to buy the pool, but vodka is stocked. I haven’t bought a good sprinkler but have gone through a few cheap ones. My girls do things with sprinklers that disallow pics. I used to think girls were different than boys. Ha!

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:40 am #

      Hahaha, kids are funny like that.

  9. melissawhayes July 9, 2013 at 11:46 am #

    HAHA! The state helicopters got a view of me lounging in the hard plastic kiddie pool with my legs, arms and head hanging over the side last Friday. At least, I was hidden from public view on my rooftop deck! And, being the free spirit I am, no vodka necessary. :p The resulting sunburn is not so enjoyable.

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 11:55 am #

      Haha, I can see this now. Lucky helicopters! Miss you.

  10. Katie July 9, 2013 at 12:06 pm #

    Nosey neighbors and living near a semi-busy street makes the sprinkler and pool a little tricky… But the vodka, I like!

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 12:07 pm #

      Yes that could be an issue. Vodka prior to the rest might be helpful!

  11. Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher July 9, 2013 at 1:48 pm #

    Of course when I saw the title, my wacko brain saw this “Summer Fun for Polish People”

    Luckily I never had any dignity…

  12. pastramibasket July 9, 2013 at 6:10 pm #

    Maybe 1-3 are key, too. I used 4-6 a few summer’s ago and it led to the idea I was an Olympic pole vaulter.

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 9:00 pm #

      That. Is. Awesome. How’d you do?

      • pastramibasket July 9, 2013 at 9:35 pm #

        Not well because the stick I was using broke and I ended up chipping my heel bone. So, bronze?

        • La La July 9, 2013 at 9:37 pm #

          Silver because drunk!

  13. My Crazy NY Post-Grad Life July 9, 2013 at 9:17 pm #

    HAHAHAHAHA I will probably do this!

    <3, Charlotte

    • La La July 9, 2013 at 9:19 pm #

      I officially heart you. DO IT!

  14. Jen and Tonic July 10, 2013 at 12:41 am #

    I totally read that as “no diggity” and it took me back to junior high when I was just a lonely girl, rapping to my own reflection in the bathroom mirror.

    • La La July 10, 2013 at 1:19 am #

      THANK GOD. No offense but ME TOO. We would have been pals.

  15. David Stewart July 10, 2013 at 9:35 am #

    Sounds like a very scientific formula for a good time. I had to go back and listen to “No Diggity.” Then, because I thought it would hilarious, I found the Nightcore version of it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOArW00hZuk

    • La La July 10, 2013 at 11:27 am #

      Hahahahahahaha I am listening to that now. Thank you.

  16. BrainRants July 10, 2013 at 1:44 pm #

    I just pour cold beer down my gullet. The judgement banning me from wearing swimwear is still in effect.

  17. Burns the Fire July 10, 2013 at 4:03 pm #

    Thanks for the encouragement. I have a ‘mist’ function on my hose that is my idea of heaven on a hot day.

  18. Maggie O'C July 10, 2013 at 7:47 pm #

    You give the best most financially responsible advice involving Vodka of anyone on WP. Glad you are back, doll.

  19. kitchenmudge July 12, 2013 at 2:00 am #

    Lazy alternative: sit in a cool bathtub all day. Requires cooperative cohabitants, though.

    • La La July 12, 2013 at 8:03 am #

      Yeaaaah I’m pretty lazy, So that works too. ;-)

  20. Madame Weebles July 12, 2013 at 3:20 pm #

    If only we had the room for a blow-up pool. Sadly, our balcony probably can’t sustain the weight of even a filled kiddie pool, and would collapse onto our downstairs neighbors. And we have no sprinklers, although maybe if we set off the sprinklers in our ceiling that would be nice. But we have everything else, even the No Diggity. Thank you for these very helpful tips, lady.

  21. Andrew July 15, 2013 at 10:41 pm #

    One can never have enough Blackstreet references. Thank you. Oh and this was hilarious.

  22. savioni August 1, 2013 at 12:56 am #

    I’ve never heard the phrase: “Poorish People.” Love it!

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