This was a challenging week for one brave woman who faced 7 full days of incalculable perils. Most notably, she drove for 6 hours to attend a bachelorette party and managed not to punch any rude, grabby dudes at the bar. On another quest, she sat through a three-hour graduation without checking her phone and believe it or not, watched back-to-back-to-back-to-back episodes of River Monsters and Dual Survival on the same day without complaining. Oh, and also that show about bush people in Alaska. Whether that one guy has a speech impediment or an accent, we’ll never know for sure.
This very same woman juggled 3 different jobs, wrote poetry for an upcoming project and suffered through 6 hours total of exercising with Jillian Michaels without cussing once, which should go on some kind of record.
Fortunately, the week’s obstacles came to a close today (hopefully) after she was forced to listen to her boss give a 45-minute description of the menstrual cycle of female macaques. There’s a lot of swelling and yelling that happens, in case you were wondering. The images from that description will likely haunt our valiant heroine for the rest of her life.
I, of course, am this woman. Please take a moment to admire me for my brave deeds and noble qualities.
Now I am off to begin a new adventure in Honduras and Mexico where I will continue to fight on behalf of you all for justice, love, peace, sexual equality, a beautiful tan, alcoholic drinks served in pineapples and free hot dogs.
Have a lovely week!