If I Were A Linguist

14 Apr

This morning in the shower I wrote a poem about being a linguist. I am not a linguist, but this is what would happen if I were one.

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If I were a linguist
who uses her tongue freely,
I would be cunning and write a poem about
driving a lexis
and wearing a diphthong.

There’d be something in there about synnning
and taxes and that’s why
I’d be awkward and have no friends
if I were a linguist,

so I wouldn’t be much different from who I am now,
if I were a linguist.

33 Responses to “If I Were A Linguist”

Carrie Rubin April 14, 2013 at 11:49 am #

Linguist or not, you taught me a new word: diphthong. And go figure, it has nothing to do with wearing a thong.

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- La La April 14, 2013 at 11:57 am #
  
  I am thinking about making a tie-dye thong business now and I’ll call it Diphthong. Enjoy your new word!
  
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  - Ausaf Abidi April 14, 2013 at 12:30 pm #
    
    Me too. Dipthong was a new word…. and so is monothong.
    Witty post…… as usual.
    … and consider me as a photographer when you start ur tie & dye venture. 🙂
    Stay blessed!
    
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    - La La April 14, 2013 at 12:38 pm #
      
      Haha, you’re in!!!!!
      
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      - Ausaf Abidi April 14, 2013 at 12:43 pm #
        
        Thanks 😆
        
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Nagzilla April 14, 2013 at 12:24 pm #

I love that you said you’d be a cunning linguist. LOL!

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- La La April 14, 2013 at 2:57 pm #
  
  Had to sneak it in despite the common usage of it! 😉
  
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The Bumble Files April 14, 2013 at 1:03 pm #

La La, you should make it a regular practice to write poems in the shower!

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- La La April 14, 2013 at 3:05 pm #
  
  Shower Poetry — A Collection by Lauren Moscato.
  
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contemplatinglove April 14, 2013 at 1:33 pm #

nice one! I studied linguistics…in depth. not a fun thing to do, trust me 😀

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- La La April 14, 2013 at 2:15 pm #
  
  I took linguistics 101 “for fun” when I was in college and I can’t imagine taking it further. Well done!
  
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Maddie Cochere April 14, 2013 at 3:31 pm #

Shower poetry is definitely for you, La La! In your lexis, you could wear a blouse, or a flower, or just a TOWEL, but don’t frown if a clown jumps in with a toy.

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Anonymous April 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm #

That’s a shower well spent! I’m usually sitting there staring at the tiles.

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Not Quite Alice April 14, 2013 at 7:06 pm #

Hehe. Love it hun. Showers are the bestest places to come up with things. Well there and in my dreams.

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David Stewart April 14, 2013 at 8:50 pm #

You are brilliant. Just gotta say. As someone who loves linguistics, I found this particularly great. I don’t think I’d have the confidence to wear a diphthong in public though. 🙂

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gingerfightback April 15, 2013 at 2:43 am #

Diphthong is a lovely word! Cedilla to! Great word play

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- La La April 15, 2013 at 10:27 am #
  
  I didn’t know that thing was called a cedilla! Love it.
  
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  - gingerfightback April 15, 2013 at 10:59 am #
    
    Umlau springs to mind as well – I think it lurks over letters too.
    
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    - La La April 15, 2013 at 11:04 am #
      
      Umlaut is a personal favorite of mine. I love language and the history of the English language, especially.
      
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      - gingerfightback April 15, 2013 at 11:06 am #
        
        Agreed – just a shame I can’t spell it very well!
        
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rheath40 April 15, 2013 at 8:01 am #

I’ve nominated you for an award honey. Please accept it. No pressure though. Kisses.

http://rendezvouswithrenee.com/2013/04/14/very-inspiring-blogger-award-why-i-write/

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Andrew April 15, 2013 at 10:19 am #

This was genius, and I think you taught all of us a new word. Thank you for this on Monday morning.

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- La La April 15, 2013 at 10:26 am #
  
  Honestly, I think everything you write is both informative and also a true gift from the comedy gods.
  
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Nowan Zen April 18, 2013 at 12:29 pm #

The Diphthong is still pinging about in my mind, but I like your description of your dream job.

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- La La April 18, 2013 at 6:40 pm #
  
  Yeah? Your dream job too?
  
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  - Nowan Zen April 18, 2013 at 7:48 pm #
    
    1. I happen to like tiedye.
    2. My dream job is people watching.
    3. Thongs are fanny-flossers but I don’t mind some who wear them. I am not a wearer though.
    
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    - La La April 22, 2013 at 10:35 am #
      
      Fanny flossers! I am going to call it that now just because.
      
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      - Nowan Zen April 22, 2013 at 10:41 am #
        
        Hooray, we have a new phrase to phase. 🙂
        
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iamforchange April 20, 2013 at 9:20 pm #

http://iamforchange.wordpress.com/awards-page-and-nominations-thank-you-i-am-so-honored-and-grateful/ I wanted to share with you and say thank you!

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Sandee May 7, 2013 at 8:36 am #

I like that you wouldn’t be much different from who you are now 🙂

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Stuck May 19, 2013 at 3:16 am #

Fun!

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WB July 5, 2013 at 9:35 pm #

Very good.

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