My Tight Spiral

8 Oct

The other day my boyfriend was teaching me how to throw a football so it does that spirally thing. I don’t know why I wanted it to do the thing, I just wanted it to do the thing.

I also wanted to get more power behind the throw, so he told me to use my torso to rotate my shoulders and blah blah blah long story short, I eventually threw it as perfectly as anyone could with all the spirals and sparkles and everything, but when I did, what do you think happened?


Was it:

A. I fell on my face

B. I ripped a colossal fart 

C. I pulled a muscle


D. All of the above 


Wouldn’t that suck and be super embarrassing if it was D? Well guess what, it was totally D. Of course it was D. Go big or go home, I always say.

From across the yard my boyfriend yelled, “Ohhhhh nooooooo!” in what I swear was slow motion as my dog ran over to assess the unfortunate situation. I guess I’m just sad no one got it on camera so we could win $10,000 on America’s Funniest Videos. Is that show still on? I still don’t have cable.

Sigh. Stay tuned as I continue to cultivate awkward seeds in my ever-expanding garden of gracelessness.



At least I got a cute picture out of it



35 Responses to “My Tight Spiral”

  1. T. W. Dittmer October 8, 2013 at 3:16 pm #

    Now THAT’S a dog!


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 3:42 pm #

      Right? He’s so awesome and carries himself with far more grace than I ever will.


  2. October 8, 2013 at 3:26 pm #

    Glad you are ok! A funny mental picture indeed : )


  3. Burns the Fire October 8, 2013 at 3:29 pm #

    I am happy to throw the ball around in your garden of grace.


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 3:44 pm #

      You forgot the the “lessness” part!


  4. gingerfightback October 8, 2013 at 3:42 pm #

    Whoops a daisy


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 3:43 pm #

      Hahaha, common words on this end.


  5. eric keys October 8, 2013 at 4:04 pm #

    The trick is to never try anything new.



    • La La October 8, 2013 at 4:09 pm #

      Ooooh, that makes sense. Trying new things means risks, and I always lose whenever I risk anything!!!


  6. Carrie Rubin October 8, 2013 at 4:51 pm #

    As I was reading this, I thought, “Oh, I hope La La didn’t injure her arm.” But sure enough, you did. And then some… (Hope you’re okay!)


  7. Pigeon Heart October 8, 2013 at 5:15 pm #

    *over-sharing* (;


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 5:23 pm #

      As always, my pigeon-hearted gal pal. As always.


  8. Twindaddy October 8, 2013 at 6:18 pm #

    Lol, nice. I’m always so jealous of the things you accomplish.


  9. bodhisattvaintraining October 8, 2013 at 6:24 pm #

    Ha ha – sorry NOT funny but I just read a post that left me in tears, followed by this one. I’m a mess on the couch..and hey ‘at least’ you got the boyfriend 🙂


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 7:21 pm #

      Haha sorry. You must have been all over the place!!


      • bodhisattvaintraining October 9, 2013 at 5:04 am #

        yeah but all good 🙂 good to get away from your own head for a while you know !


  10. ddupre315 October 8, 2013 at 6:39 pm #

    lol epic..and that’s an awesome dog!


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 11:46 pm #

      Aw thanks. He’s pretty great.


  11. Monk Monkey October 8, 2013 at 8:05 pm #

    Video please!


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 11:45 pm #

      I wish.


  12. Lori D October 8, 2013 at 8:59 pm #

    OMG, this one had me laughing hysterically. Oh wait … are you okay? Sounds like your precious puppy came over to make sure. I’m guessing your bf did too. LOL I have to share this with my bff. Hope you’re feeling okay after your ‘all of the above’ incident.


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 10:10 pm #

      Oh I’m fine now haha. Thanks lady. That little (big) guy does his best to care for me as much as a doggie can!


      • Lori D October 8, 2013 at 10:20 pm #

        Glad to hear you have two great boys to care for you (your doggie is a boy, right?). BTW, America’s Funniest Videos IS still on, and it’s on a primetime network (ABC). I love that show, especially if someone throws a football, farts, falls on their face and pulls a muscle. You can win a lot more money on it these days. Too bad you didn’t get that video sistah.


        • La La October 8, 2013 at 11:44 pm #

          Yes! I always loved the animal segments! Yes both my dudes. Porter was most concerned, haha.


  13. Trent Lewin October 8, 2013 at 10:08 pm #

    I’m never ever playing football with you. Or any other sport.


    • La La October 8, 2013 at 10:09 pm #

      Hmph. Well you’re missing out, sir.


      • Trent Lewin October 8, 2013 at 10:17 pm #

        Just jokes… I don’t want to have to scrape you out of a mudpile and encounter some rancid cloud of unmentionable gas. Also, I suck at sports and fall often.


        • La La October 8, 2013 at 11:45 pm #

          Wow we would be a horrible team haha!


          • Trent Lewin October 9, 2013 at 2:53 pm #

            But at least we would have a sense of humour.


  14. The Bumble Files October 8, 2013 at 11:41 pm #

    Oh, La La. You got a good story out of it, too. I can never throw a football like that. I admire you for doing it. Yay, you did it!


  15. David Stewart October 9, 2013 at 6:15 am #

    I agree with Amy, the worse the experience, the better the story (unless someone dies). Cute picture too. 🙂


    • La La October 9, 2013 at 3:03 pm #

      Hah thanks. I’ll keep up the good work. 😉


  16. Maddie Cochere October 9, 2013 at 12:33 pm #

    Too funny! I totally thought that would make a great scene in a book, and then it dawned on me that it would make a heart-wrenching scene in a book if it weren’t for the colossal fart. You are the woMAN, LaLa!!


    • La La October 9, 2013 at 3:04 pm #

      A heart-wrenching scene in real life….


  17. Shaye Walsh November 18, 2013 at 11:18 am #

    Cute pup! When you get a chance, can you email me? I’d like to ask you a couple questions.



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