In memory.

14 May


I would like to say I am sorry for the time we fought and I got all worked up and did not know what to do so I farted on your cat and shouted, “Take that!”

Hey, it lightened the mood and we both laughed so hard that we couldn’t breathe. Isn’t that the best kind of laughter?

Later, you told me I should post about it, but I never did because, I mean, who does that? Well, I guess I do. Hey, I never said I was perfect.

I am sure you’re having a nice laugh in heaven right now remembering that one.

Life will be forever different after today and you know what? I have never been so scared. I will miss the way you used to hold my shoulders, look in my eyes and say, “Be brave, you’ve got this.  I’ve seen what you can do.”

Be brave.

I think that today, after your funeral, I am going to go home and hug your stinky cat, run in the pouring rain and sing every song from Grease 2 at the very top of my lungs. That was our favorite.

Rest easy, Dane. Wow, I am going to miss you.


30 Responses to “In memory.”

  1. Kyle May 14, 2012 at 10:09 am #



  2. pivoine68 May 14, 2012 at 1:22 pm #

    I’m sorry My La La.


  3. Simon May 14, 2012 at 1:22 pm #

    Nothing easy about it. Touching. Tonight we bowl!


  4. Maggie O'C May 14, 2012 at 1:35 pm #

    You are a lovely girl with horrible taste in musicals.


  5. RFL May 14, 2012 at 2:03 pm #

    I’m sorry again for your loss. At least you didn’t light the fart on fire 🙂 If life ever gives me the opportunity to fart on a cat to lighten the mood, I will do it now because of this story.


    • La La May 14, 2012 at 9:16 pm #

      Do it…just don’t light it on fire haha


  6. Pigeon Heart May 14, 2012 at 2:40 pm #

    ps leave cats alone from now on.


  7. crubin May 14, 2012 at 4:14 pm #

    Sorry again for your loss. Life can be really crappy. But remember, there is nothing wrong with wanting a “cool, cool, cool, cool rider…”


    • La La May 14, 2012 at 9:15 pm #

      you feel me!!! A c-o-o-l r-i-d-e-r!


  8. chrisdevoss May 14, 2012 at 4:34 pm #



  9. The Hook May 15, 2012 at 8:07 am #

    What a wonderful, loving and fun tribute. i love it when people remember the good times, rather than wallow in their loss. You’re a special gal!


    • La La May 15, 2012 at 10:16 am #

      Aw thanks buddy, I agree. Grieving is good, but it’s important to honestly remember the good.


  10. Jen and Tonic October 28, 2012 at 6:36 pm #

    I’m late to this, but I wanted to say I commend your strength for writing this. It’s very beautiful.


    • La La October 28, 2012 at 6:55 pm #

      Thank you, that means a lot. I’m not sure how I got that one out now that I think back on it. Grief and coping mechanisms can do odd things. Right now I’m mad at him because he never taught me how to charge his generator and I’m frustrated. Where’s that cat!


  11. rheath40 January 15, 2013 at 10:44 am #

    I’m so sorry for your loss hon. I know it was last May but there will always be a scar. Fortunately scars are the memories we keep of those we’ve loved. They make even the unpleasant memories tolerable. Much love darlin’.


    • La La January 15, 2013 at 11:11 am #

      Scars are the memories we keep of those we’ve loved, but it’s also the scar that with hurt every time I almost back away from what I truly love. It’s a reminder to keep moving and fighting for what I love because life is too fucking short. It is.


      • rheath40 January 15, 2013 at 11:13 am #

        Yes baby it is. Fight for love. Fight, fight, fight.


        • La La January 15, 2013 at 11:17 am #

          I am fighting with every breath, and I will do so, willingly and lovingly, until the day I die.


          • rheath40 January 15, 2013 at 11:20 am #

            Me too honey. Me too. I believe love is the only thing worth fighting for.


  12. Trent Lewin February 18, 2014 at 9:31 pm #

    Oh wow… I’m so sorry. I hope he can read your note from heaven.


  13. theclocktowersunset February 19, 2014 at 2:02 am #

    …..Don’t tell, okay?



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