Skype Strip

15 Aug

Recently I was skyping with someone about an outline I made for a possible book. He is kind of a dick sometimes, but he has good ideas. We both had a glass of wine, we talked and flirted a little, and he suddenly said to me, “You should strip for me, do a dance, maybe touch yourself a little.”

I rolled my eyes.

“C’mon pretty girl, do it! Stop being so worried about your book. This will be fun and will release some of the tension!” he continued.

“Oohhh, I don’t know, I’m feeling kind of shy,” I replied. “You first.” I was kind of kidding.

Then I saw the mischievous man-grin. He looked through his music library for a minute, turned on “Lick it Up” by Kiss (haha, I know, right?) and stood up. I sat on my couch and watched as he actually danced, stripped to the music and then did the thing with his thing. You know, that helicopter thing. I was dumbfounded.

So then it was my turn. Frick. I didn’t think that when I said, “You first” that he was going to just get up and do it. Men. You know, one of the main things I have learned in 2012 is that men have little to no shame.  Jesus.

So I picked a song (you know I love my Tom Jones)

and I got up (I had on pink leopard print boxers), whipped my hair out of my ponytail and just started dancing my silly ass off. Robot? Yep. Twist? Absolutely. Carlton dance? No doubt.  Shakin’ the tail feathers like my dad does at weddings? Fucking right.

It was a lot of fun, and it did release tension, but the guy got really mad at me about it and he hasn’t spoken to me since. Really? Some gals don’t skype strip, especially not on command, and I think someone needs a better sense of humor.

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41 Responses to “Skype Strip”

  1. Fish Out of Water August 15, 2012 at 3:30 pm #

    That is very, very funny!

    Like

  2. Madame Weebles August 15, 2012 at 3:37 pm #

    It’s true, guys will do pretty much anything if they think they’ll get to see naked lady parts. Plus, I’ve found that guys are much less shy about stripping down than girls are. Bless them. And tell him to get over himself and stop pouting.

    What about installing a pole so you can pole dance for him?

    Like

    • La La August 15, 2012 at 3:43 pm #

      Haha, God love ’em.

      I tried that pole dancing class…not a talent of mine. I excelled a bit more in the chair class.

      Like

  3. Carrie Rubin August 15, 2012 at 3:39 pm #

    Sounds like the perfect response to me. You had fun, released tension, AND maintained your dignity. Well, except for the Tom Jones song. 😉

    Like

    • La La August 15, 2012 at 4:58 pm #

      Thanks, I’d like to think so. I’ll forgive you for that Tom Jones comment, a-thank you!

      Like

      • Carrie Rubin August 15, 2012 at 7:22 pm #

        Well, Delilah, Its Not Unusual to wonder What’s New, Pussycat…

        Like

  4. Christopher De Voss August 15, 2012 at 3:56 pm #

    I can’t tell you how many times I have stripped/masturbated to Kiss’ Lick It Up, only to have a robot dance in return. Come on! Kiss’ Lick It Up! What’s wrong with you females?! What is this country coming to? I’m moving to Canada where the women appreciate our efforts!

    Like

    • Le Clown August 15, 2012 at 7:37 pm #

      Chris,
      It takes a few hours just to remove the layers of clothes we wear in Canada, from the polar bear skin to the anti-freeze we apply on our skin. I’d rethink this if I were you…
      Le Clown

      Like

      • Christopher De Voss August 16, 2012 at 1:18 am #

        Every Canadian I have ever met has been very nice. I’m going!

        Are we allowed to ride the moose?

        Like

  5. Frivolous Monsters August 15, 2012 at 4:38 pm #

    The more I read your posts, the more I’m concerned for the type of readers that you attract. I’m slightly worried, because as I’m here that seems to make me one of them.

    Like

    • La La August 15, 2012 at 4:54 pm #

      You, sir, are next! (muhahaha!)

      Like

  6. Maggie O'C August 15, 2012 at 4:58 pm #

    HAHAHAHA. I wish I could change the size of the font for this response because it would be 60 pt bold HAHAHAHAHA

    You rock my face off. I can’t believe this. Kids these days. Who in their right mind thinks a cool Charm City Chick is going dance and get off on Skype?!?!

    Did you know you needed to release some tension? My boyfriend would totally do this and I would put on Bon Jovi and do some intense clothed 80s dancing.

    Like

    • La La August 15, 2012 at 5:00 pm #

      I needed a release of tension, as always. I get worked up and I think too much.

      And heck yes you would with Bon Jovi! I would like to see that, actually.

      Like

      • Maggie O'C August 15, 2012 at 5:03 pm #

        I’ll get a bottle of wine on tonight and skype you.

        Like

        • La La August 15, 2012 at 5:12 pm #

          YES! I can’t wait.

          Like

  7. JWo August 15, 2012 at 6:18 pm #

    Having just busted my Skype cherry today (web interview) this is really funny.

    I was worried the lady was gonna ask me to stand up because I only had a button up shirt on…. OK and shorts.

    I’m glad she didn’t do anything like that but then again I don’t think most women would. But you definitely taught him a lesson that he’ll remember the next time he tries to run his game. HAHAHA…

    And at least you were complimentary to him…

    Like

    • La La August 15, 2012 at 7:46 pm #

      I hope your interview went well! That’s so funny that it was just today.

      I hope he learned a lesson, but probably not…and hey, I give compliments when they are due, haha.

      Like

  8. ardent and awkward in austin August 15, 2012 at 7:07 pm #

    Oh my! Men are funny beings. I just figured out how to take a screen shot a few days ago (I had no idea it was that easy). FYI. Ha!

    Like

    • La La August 15, 2012 at 7:47 pm #

      A fine thing to know indeed…I will be looking this up ASAP 😉

      Like

  9. RFL August 15, 2012 at 8:45 pm #

    You are frickin awesome!

    Like

  10. Carolina Courtland August 15, 2012 at 9:16 pm #

    You lead a way more interesting life than I do.

    Like

  11. calahan August 15, 2012 at 9:47 pm #

    Is his Skype name I’m-A-Humorless-Douchebag by any chance?

    Like

    • La La August 15, 2012 at 10:13 pm #

      That’s him! Hopefully you haven’t crossed paths…

      Like

      • calahan August 15, 2012 at 10:19 pm #

        Not yet, but when we do, we may have to cross swords and fight for your honor. *gentlemanly bow*

        Like

        • La La August 15, 2012 at 10:24 pm #

          Myyyyyy heeerrrrooo!

          My laughter resounded throughout my house on that one. Thank you.

          Like

      • Honey March 3, 2017 at 12:25 am #

        Fiindng this post. It’s just a big piece of luck for me.

        Like

  12. pivoine68 August 16, 2012 at 4:03 am #

    Go La La Go!!!

    Bisous,
    Dawn

    Like

    • La La August 16, 2012 at 6:27 am #

      Odd. You were in my dream last night!

      Like

      • pivoine68 August 16, 2012 at 12:26 pm #

        Was I dancing with Tom Jones? 🙂

        Like

        • La La August 16, 2012 at 1:06 pm #

          No…you came to my house and made me dinner. It was weird!

          Like

          • pivoine68 August 16, 2012 at 2:20 pm #

            That is weird! I love to cook!

            Like

            • La La August 16, 2012 at 3:20 pm #

              Oh, well thank you for my dream dinner. It was lovely. I brought wine.

              Like

  13. Kathy V. August 16, 2012 at 2:09 pm #

    You attract the wrong kind of attention, girlfriend. But I guess that’s what you get for being smart and sexy and living in a world where men are such douches.

    Like

  14. Elliot August 16, 2012 at 3:23 pm #

    Did he not know it is polite to ask a lady on a date first prior to busting out his own pole dance on the webcam?

    Like

    • La La August 16, 2012 at 3:26 pm #

      He knows now 😉

      Like

  15. Bob August 16, 2012 at 6:31 pm #

    OH, La La! Boinnng!

    Like

  16. Nifti August 20, 2012 at 3:13 pm #

    LoL! Too funny!

    Like

  17. The Bumble Files January 15, 2013 at 10:14 pm #

    I had to look this up. This is hilarious!! And, the video has been removed. Did the guy get mad?

    Like

    • La La January 15, 2013 at 10:15 pm #

      HAHA I guess Tom Jones got mad. It was a Tom Jones video that I adored..”sex bomb.” Thank you, glad you enjoyed it.

      Like

  18. Anonymous June 2, 2013 at 4:24 am #

    Wat is ur skype name

    Like

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. A Quickie | tales of a charm city chick - December 31, 2013

    […] I haven’t seen any douchey guys strip on Skype and my opinion still stands that James Spader was hot when he was […]

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