So, you guys remember my nemesis, Ricky, right? The guy I work with? You know, the guy who didn’t laugh at my Steely Dan joke about losing my number because apparently “he didn’t know the song” and, subsequently, lost my number?
Well, I don’t know how many more nights I could lie awake wondering if Ricky actually lost my office number, if he truly didn’t know the song or if he was just being a dick.
I wasn’t sure I’d ever learn the truth.
However, during another meeting a few days ago, as I stared at Ricky to see if I could catch a glimpse of the dark soul that surely exists underneath his hair gel and professional business person façade, he randomly turned and winked at me. It was then that I realized the truth about Ricky–he didn’t lose my number. He sucks and he just wanted me to feel dumb. Douche.
Well, whatever, Ricky. Your potent hair gel leaves a smell in the elevator long after you’re gone and sometimes there’s a booger almost falling out of your nose and I hate you and you’ll pay for this.
Ricky, burning my number
Also, I’d like to wish a Happy Pastramiversary to Jon, the unique cartoon/photo artist over at http://www.pastramibasket.wordpress.com who provided his Ricky interpretation. Thanks, dude!
You can also find Pastrami Basket on Facebook and it’s awesome, so you should go to there.
tales of a charm city chick 
I’m not at all surprised Ricky has boogers falling out of his nose at business meetings. Definitely a douche. Oh and Team Pastrami unite!
LikeLike
UNITE! Jon actually captured him quite well for never having seen the guy. I simply described him as a “broseph.”
LikeLike
The guy seems like a total fuck stick ass hat. Boooo Ricky.
LikeLike
He so is.
LikeLike
Yayyy Lauren, she’s our gal. She’s our precious! We loves her forever.
LikeLike
Haha, thanks Bob/Smeagol.
LikeLike
I’m glad you got that, otherwise I’d be getting creepy!
LikeLike
I’m in total agreement that Ricky is nefarious, but don’t hate on his booger nose. Some of us seriously cannot feel when we have cliffhangers. I’m a sufferer myself.
LikeLike
Haha, cliffhangers! I understand, I was just mad because his are likely evil. I’m a sufferer too sometimes–everyone is. We’re all in this together.
LikeLike
I remember back in high school when I used to use hair gel. 🙂
LikeLike
The days of yore.
LikeLike
Winking really should be outlawed. It’s never appropriate and honestly, when does it not seem super creepy? Especially when it’s someone who can’t wink well.
LikeLike
Woah, good point. I can’t think of a single wink that hasn’t made either myself or a friend feel like we needed a shower.
LikeLike
When you said he winked at you, in my mind’s vision, my disgust for him added ‘finger guns’ and that click-click noise with the one cheek Ugh!
LikeLike
EVEN WORSE.
LikeLike
Oh, this isn’t going to end well.
I’m not saying it won’t end hilariously.
Just not well.
LikeLike
Haha, well as long as we can laugh about it later…
LikeLike
Douchecanoes. Douchecanoes everywhere!
LikeLike
Next time he winks at you, hand him a tissue.
LikeLike
Hahaha, I’ll carry a pack around just waiting for it.
LikeLike
He’s probably found your blog and now thinks he’s famous – boogers and all. Love Jon’s Ricky interpretation.
LikeLike
Ugggh I hate him. Jon did a great job!
LikeLike
Why thank you!
LikeLike
You’re welcome. 🙂
LikeLike
The way I see it, you have a new work toy now. ; ) Kinda like a hackey sack, but human.
LikeLike
Hahaha, I was never good with those.
LikeLike
All the more reason to practice with Tricky Ricky…you know, when you’re bored.
LikeLike
He probably wears ‘Axe for Men’. Bleh…
LikeLike
Probably. It’s so overpowering!! Like 8 too many sprays style.
LikeLike
Aw, gag with me with a spatula.
LikeLike
I simultaneously hate and love cartoon Ricky. Nice work, Pastrami! As for Human Ricky, I can practically smell the hair gel fumes.
LikeLike
What a douche, La La! You must stop him. Light his hair on fire. Sorry, I just want to protect you. That’s a great cartoon.
LikeLike
Hey, Ricky, you’re so fine. You’re so fine, you blow my mind…EXCEPT THE OPPOSITE!
LikeLike
Hahahahahaha!
LikeLike
I TOLD you!! And now you’re calling him boogerhead…. How sweet, I think I smell more than hair gel. Next thing you know he’s gonna come over and pull your ponytail on the playground. 🙂 🙂
We’ve got to come up with a game plan, a reverse “Ricky don’t lose my number” gag. Hmmm….. I’m quite partial to going to the supermarket and getting a gazillion of those little subscribers outta magazines and sending them all in with someone’s address and funny names. But I don’t think that follows the theme very well here.
I think I’ve got it! You’ll have to find abunch of Steely Dan websites and fanclubs, then subscribe or “join” with his e-mail address. He’ll be getting Steely Dan spam for ages, just keep it up. Though kinda wondering how many websites and fanclubs there could possibly be for Steel Dan out there. This might need some retooling a bit. We’ll have to work out the kinks, but the ball is in your court now. So you need to strike while the iron is hot.
LikeLike
Oh my god. You’re a genius. A true genius.
LikeLike
My talents are often overlooked, under-appreciated and wasted, but in this arena I excel. I am at your service, tweet me and we can devise a plan to rival any caper even The Joker could pull on ‘ol Batman and GothamCity himself. Too bad we missed April fools. 😦 😦
None the less, to the think tank(insert super villain alias)!
LikeLike